The War!!!

It's funny how the heart and the brain work.. It's quite like the teenager & parents relationship..Brain says 'something'..Heart says "GET off my back"..Brain says "I am concerned about you".Heart says "Yea watever"..Brain says "Its not good for u" Heart shouts back "I am not a kid!!!! I can take care of myself".. Brain tries to give logic. For heart none of it makes sense!!like ever!!..
Everyone says listen to your heart..close ur eyes ,think for a moment and go for whatever your heart thinks is right.!!!But isn't that kind of oxymoronic??!!"Heart THINKS"???
When things go right we say "he/she followed the heart..Look they did it"..and when things take a wrong turn mind mocks at heart and says "I told u so!!!You should have listened to me"!!You brainless creature!!!
How ironic is this that they can't function without each other??Nothing will happen if they don't work together  but still they fight..The world would be a lovely place if the heart and the brain were in love with each other..not the blind kind of love..the kind where they understand each other..talk about issues..give each other space but still be together..You know the soul mate kinds!!Where they know what's right what's wrong and they don't let disasters happen..and even if something does go wrong they support each other..when they look at each other there is a rush in the brain and the heart starts beating faster making a lub and a dub sound!!!
Whoever says he or she is not a romantic or is not a believer in love  would be the biggest liar in the world!!At least I think so.
Whoever created us made sure that Love is always inside us..may be it hurts at times.may be it gives pain,may be it makes people run away from it..but its always there.Nothing and no one can erase it.
Fighting it is an easier option of course!

Mirror on the wall..

Mirror Mirror on the wall..

who is the scariest of them all???

Heart break??failure??

Not living upto expectations??

entering the phase of frustration??

Being stabbed in the back??

dark secrets in the shack?? 

Love walking out of life..

after a heated strife??

The mirror answered..

The scariest day is the day my dear..

when you wake up in grip of fear..

when you look at the mirror 

and you don't see You..

Cup of coffee..Rain and Randomness..

Its raining!!!Its raining in November in Hyderabad!!!one of those sudden ones without any warning..like the cloud has burst open fully determined to soak the earth.. 
 Hyderabad has become close..ummm no not close..a step sister may be (cos Bombay has all the fun and this place not so much) to Bombay..rains come any time of the day..you see the bright sunny sky one second and then get drenched in another..

Its lazy sunday afternoon for me..heck i don't get saturdays off..that's the one thing I hate about my current job!!

Rains make me nostalgic..everytime..and also makes me want to smoke..i just want to sit with a cup of coffee in my balcony and watch the down pour..listening to some music..a movie in the background..a song in my mind..my flatmate is listening to Hey there Delilah..the song makes me kind of sad and makes me want to cry..no reason..its just the song..also reminds me of a friend who sings this one beautifully..

its still raining..

Jason Mraz is humming life is wonderful..i love the song..it has an element of sadness and still makes me happy.. all these people making beautiful songs make me want to sing..but i don't have the voice i used to have..guess loads of extremely hot coffee tea followed by extremely chilled water ice cream coke..smoking and smoking up drinking and drinking has kind of fucked my throat..
My guitar is giving me looks..begging to be strummed..
My running shoes are pleading to be used..
Someday soon..
My face is complaining as well..time to hit a salon..
If it kills me in the background..
My feet are demanding some new pair of shoes..no decent place in Hyderabad has stuff I want..hummpphh..
I want to dance in the rain..guess I should go to the terrace and atleast get soaked..then have some coffee and smoke..
seems like a good idea:)
My cook's son started clapping when i showed him all the purple on my blog..Music turns him on..he starts dancing the moment you play a song..He is just a year old :)and he wants a drag from my smoke..am a bad bad influence on him..
It stopped Raining!!!!all of a sudden..
went away just the same way it came..
sounds like somebody i know..knew actually or thought i did..

Quarter life Crisis!!!!

My Birthday has never been scarier for me.
Come October 13th and I would have graced the world with my precious 25 years..
Never have I been so scared by a number..Not even by the marks I got in exams just by studying cum mugging a night before..not even by CAT percentile when it was/is supposed to be life changing..but now I am officially scared..25 is a SCARY SCARY number!!!PERIOD.
I was cool when I turned 20..from teens to twenties didn't effect me that much..I actually didn't even think about it..It was close to the "legal" age when I was allowed to get drunk sloshed and smashed and get away with it saying 'O I am only 21'.
22 cool..23 cool 24 cool..and then BAM..TWENTY FIVE!!!It's not so cool anymore..
Every day is going to be a countdown now..Each day the thought of doing something great something meaningful will always be on the back or front or all over my mind..so that when I am actually standing on 13th October 2010 and look back I feel not so pathetic..
so much to do so little time..things I haven't done in 25 years I want all of them done in a month!!
Normally everyone is expected to accomplish something in their lives by this time..For god sake its only 5 more years until that big THREE-O!!
It's considered to be an important milestone signifying stability..and well I am no where near that!
Biggest fear???This would be the first birthday when I'll be actually thinking about me getting OLD!!When I wake up that morning I will be on the wrong side of 25..PANIC!!!scary??liberating??terrifying??
Should I feel ridiculous for panicking???I guess not..after all it is meant to be this way..quarter life crisis and all..
Sometimes a wave of anxiety just hits me with a force..
I am going to be 25!!
Holy Hell!!
Analysis of every aspect of life has already begun.Where is it going??Why haven't I traveled around the world yet??questions like that are just popping in mind.
There are so many things wrong that I want to change, hoped to have changed by now!No time now!!Crap.
If someone can grant me just one wish right now???I will turn the calendar a couple of years back!!!!
So unless some miraculous epiphany unfolds in these few days.
I am hoping this anxiety wave lasts about…2 minutes. :)

P.S. There is actually a movie by this name."Quarter Life crisis" :D
P.P.S.  a song as well!!!! :D :D

My Random 25..

With my 25th birthday fast approaching and everyone around me celebrating either a 25th anniversary or 25th birthday the number has got stuck in my mind.

So here are some random 25 things about me in no particular order.

1.       I love eating!!!I can eat almost anything in the world that tastes good and doesn’t sound/look yucky and that I don’t have to cook.

2.       I can sleep at any hour..anywhere..Once I slept in a T.V. showroom while my friends were checking out stuff..I have slept in the most uncomfortable back seats in the cars while on road trips..I can even sleep during a meeting with my eyes wide open occasionally nodding and smiling when required(that is a talent!!!)

3.        I can wake up in the middle of the night to have tea (made by someone else) and then go back to sleep again!!!

4.       I watch horror movies with my eyes closed during scenes where I feel something is going to happen..like a ghost popping from somewhere.

5.       While sleeping I listen to music.

6.       I write during the wee hours of morning.

7.       I cry in happiness when I see too much of talent in someone..

8.       I love dogs!!!I want to go to a dog heaven when I die.

9.       I am a Momma’s daughter. can do anything in the world for her

10.   I love dancing..want to pursue it further sometime in future

11.   I want to travel around the world..just backpacking..with not too much money..just living a hippie life meeting all strangers

12.   My favorite show on T.V. is C.I.D!!!I can even watch repeated episodes..

13.   I and my flat mates pretend to be officers of FBI and NYPD!!

14.   As a kid I always had the fantasy of having a Christian wedding.

15.   I hate my nose!!!It’s big and distorted.

16.   I am a dreamer..day dreamer to be specific. If you are having a conversation with me and all I say is hmmm and yes while giving full attention (pretending!!) then I am busy dreaming.

17.   I love reading.

18.   I am always excited about my Birthday!!!Usually start the planning months in advance.

19.   I always lose people I value the most or end up fighting with them.

20.   I got myself a guitar (had a crush on some guy who used to play guitar ) in 2007 and till date all I know is 2 chords!!!

21.   I have yelled at an ant for biting me, at a door or a wall or side of bed for hurting me :)

22.   I am always confused..Have been given names like confused cutlet.

23.   While typing or holding a pen or a cup or anything for that matter I use only 4 fingers.The pinky finger  always revolts and never helps.

24.   I love shoes!!!!

25.   I am the laziest person I have known till date!!!

If I were...

If I were a bird, I would be: a hawk
If I were an animal, I would be: a dog
If I were an emotion, I would be: confused
If I were love I would be: selfless
If I were a day I would be: Sunday
If I were a season, I would be: winter
If I were an enemy , I would be: lethal
If I were a sin, I would be: temptation
If I were a temptation, I would be :chocolate
If I were an element, I would be: water
If I were a musical instrument, I would be: a guitar
If I were a dance, I would be: passionate
If I were a song, I would be: cacophonous!!
If I were a place, I would be: Antarctica
If I were an organ, I would be: the heart
If I were an expression, I would be: :P
If I were a color, I would be: purple
If I were a flavor, I would be:sweet & sour
If I were doing a job,I would be: wandering
If I were a landmass, I would be: an island
If I were a companion, I would be: a 
If I were a drink, I would be: refreshing
If I were a relation, I would be: a friend


If I were a habit, I would be: addiction

When it rains!!!!!

And the monsoons are here!!!!!
Marking the end of the scorching summer heat. The rains are here!!
Though winters are my favorite when it comes to seasons but monsoons hold a second place.
The sheer joy of getting drenched in the rains and gorging on chai and pakodas after that is incomparable to any other in the world.
Nostalgia always sets in when it rains thinking of all the good times which are linked to them.
Back in school rainy days were holidays which were always used to have a boat making and sailing, competition. Raincoats, umbrellas,jumping in the puddles,scolding from mom :)
Bikes rides and singing crazy songs were always fun in college days. Getting soaked with the rain drops falling on the face..dripping from head to toe..having chole kulche at the college gate..sipping on hot coffee afterward..
Tom uncle's Maggie used to taste even better during the rains.
The instant excitement when it rains was always followed by dancing in the rain and the nice cozy sleep after a cup of coffee. Sheer bliss!!!
There is something about this season. Everything is clean and pure. Leaves are washed and green. The fragrance of the earth..if only someone can capture it.
I love to hear the thunder..watch the lightning when it lights up the sky..
It just makes me feel good..I love to feel the rain on my face..to taste the rain on my lips.
Rains put a song in my mind mostly the bollywood ones where the dance sequence running around the trees in the rain always puts a smile on my face every time.

Now that the rains are here..I am gonna enjoy every bit of it..reliving the childhood I am gonna get drenched every possible time!!Bring it on!!